No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
