Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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