dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
