Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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