We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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