I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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