we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize