I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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