even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
