and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Randomize
