people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
