it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Do you remember whose house we're in?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
