I queefed so loud it echoed.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
