Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
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Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
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I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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