i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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