just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
