Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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