Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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