Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
wow bdsm is so cute
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
