well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
