Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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