If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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