No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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