Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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