ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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