i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize