I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize