can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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