I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
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You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Swine flu is the new snow day.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
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I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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