:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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