Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
