I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Randomize
