Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
