What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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