We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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