i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
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Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
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THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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