Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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