the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
