my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
