that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize