I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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