I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
