His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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