Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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