if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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