i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Everything about him screamed your future.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize