I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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