He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize