Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
