Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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